And, a Love Note from 1.10.09

Maybe it’s the pregnesia, but I think today was the first time young Master Bertram said, “I love you!” as he gave out goodnight air kisses.

Mind you, he does not like to kiss us directly. He prefers to blow the air kisses to us. I would not mind so much if I didn't watch him kiss the crocodiles, gorillas, and other odd beasties that we read about in his books.

Remembrance of Things Past

Last night, I was updating young master Bertram’s baby book, which only covers the first year of his life. As I looked at the heap of first birthday cards I had saved, I wondered if it was necessary to keep all of them. Then, given the upcoming arrival of baby no. 2, I started thinking about the purpose of a baby book. Is it for me? Is it for young Master B? Will he be interested in a meticulously kept chart of his weight and height fluctuations in the first year? As young Master B’s mother, is that want I want to remember? It’s so easy, to start collecting stuff, his first drawings for example. I still feel strange putting his early, primitive scribblings in the recycle bin.

All of these thoughts made reflect on a friend—and an only child—who had been charged with sorting through his dead parents’ belongings. The enormity of such a task, an entire lifetime of stuff. What do you keep? What do you toss? He didn’t have any siblings to ask or share in the drudgery. My friend was struggling with all the boxes of mementos his mother had dutifully saved—the report cards from elementary school, yellowed newspaper clippings, old beat-up toys. Was he under obligation to keep those things because she had kept them?

My friend was left in a no-win situation. If he tossed it, he would feel guilty. If he kept it, he would resent that he had to keep these things in his tiny, substandard NYC apartment, or worse, pay for storage.

Pondering all of this, I decided not to keep all of Bertram’s first birthday cards. I decided not to fill out his height and weight charts. I decided not to feel guilty about tossing his drawings. I decided, that what I wanted most, was to leave behind stories versus stuff or facts and figures.

When I am dead, I do not want Bertram to decide what’s important to keep. Note to self: I hope he will be free of that burden. As we go through these eighteen years, I plan to select a few items; perhaps all that can fit in one standard-sized moving box.

Basically Bertram...and His Little Sister

The careful reader of Basically Bertram might have noted that posts severely decreased starting in August 2008--precisely the same time that I (aka Parental Unit #1) discovered that I was pregnant with baby no. 2. This elusive, still developing being is now 22 weeks old, but the above anatomy scan points to a clear gender: girl.

Thus, young Master B will soon shed his only child status and become a BIG BROTHER. Part of me feels that I am robbing my little son of his solo babyhood as baby no. 2 is scheduled to arrive on April 13--two weeks before young Master B's 2nd birthday. Another part of me is excited that Bertram will have a sibling who is so close in age--hopefully, they will play together and not drive each other bananas.

I can only imagine that Bertram comprehends that the "baby in the belly" is a big pain in the pahtooty. As in, "Bertram you can't bounce on mommy anymore because of the baby in the belly." Or "Be careful not to kick me--remember the baby in the belly." Or "Mommy can't carry you right now, she's too tired from carrying the baby in the belly." Sometimes, I hold up young Master B's baby doll, hold in front of my belly, and say "look it's the baby in the belly."

I don't get a response. Bertram looks at me with a kind of "what do you mean, silly woman" expression.

In the meantime, I get bigger, just 17 weeks to go.

Give the People What They Want*

IMG_1421, originally uploaded by hal(var).
And what is it the people want at this time of year? As his parental units, we don’t expect presents, but people keep asking us, "what does young Master B want for Christmas?" Sheez, forget what his holiday wants are, if only I just could figure out what young Master B wants on a moment-to-moment basis. But I digress.

We encourage recycled toys, particularly if your first name rhymes with “pizza.” Yet, if you must spend your hard-earned Washingtons on our dear boy, then here is a list of items I can guarantee you he will enjoy:

A xylophone. A version made by Plan Toys is featured in two alphabet books that young Master B reads almost daily.

An easel. Bertram enjoys drawing with markers and making the letter “O.”

Hot Wheels cars, particularly the ones that you can scoot the wheels backwards and then the car races forward.

Jigsaw puzzles, a favorite toy in rotation right now. He has the Melissa & Doug farm sounds, work tools, and pets puzzles.

A spinning top, the more complex the better.

Wind up toys.

Any type of toy related to his favorite show, Yo Gabba Gabba. His favorite character seems to be Brobee, but I would recommend this.

* Parental Unit 2 has asked that I mention that Bertram does not or will he ever use fleece or footie PJs as our apartment is crazy hot in the winter. Young Master B is taking a nap right now with his window open and a fan going. He sometimes wakes up sweating--that's how hot our apartment is. Eeks!